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Political satire
New Progress Party (NPP) had just been registered and I was at the Party headquarters to interview party leader Meedhoo Thakur. When I was ushered in to Thakur's chamber, he was counting bundles of 500 rufiyaa notes. I assumed he must have just received a grant from the Election Commissioner. I also noticed a few car catalogues on Thakur's table, but resisted the temptation to ask Thakur about it. That was not the topic of the interview and besides, who was I to question how a party leader spent his funds? Thakur greeted me warmly and asked me to start.
"What's the purpose of NPP?" I shot the first question. Thakur looked a bit puzzled. Obviously this was a topic that had never crossed his mind. Soon however he recovered.
"We are here to serve the people," he said and added after a brief pause, "…though I'm not sure why the people are here for."
"What's your goal?" I tried a different angle.
"It's better not to have a goal," Thakur shot back. "We could then go wherever we feel and still call it a goal."
"Do you mean to say," I asked, "you won't change the direction of the present government when you come to power?"
"I didn't say that and besides we must change direction immediately," he replied, "because…because if we pursue this direction … we will reach where we are going."
"What system of government do you propose?" I changed topic.
"That's a difficult one. It all depends on the circumstances. When we are in the opposition we prefer a system like that in America. But when we are in power we prefer a system like that in North Korea."
"So you prefer the presidential system," I said, "North Korea also has a presidential system."
"Definitely not," Thakur reacted sharply, "you boys must do your homework before coming to interview senior leaders like me. North Korea does not have a president they only have a Dear Leader, which translates to 'Lobuvethi Zaeem' in Dhivehi."
"Lobuvethi Zaeem may be a nice name," I said "but how will you ensure people love you all the time?"
"I will include that in the school curriculum and also in all TV programs. If that does not work I have some less subtle methods. But let's not go in to that."
"The basis of democracy is one man one vote," I queried, "do you believe that?"
"That's not enough," Thakur said. "It should be one man one vote ONE TIME. You see, once Thakur comes to power there will be no need for any further elections."
"But Thakur," I protested. "Don't you think the people should have the power to change the government if they don't like it?"
"Certainly not." Thakur shot back. "The Majority of the people are stupid. They won't know what's good for them. Only experienced people like Thakur know what's good for the people. So the people should never have the power to change the government."
"What's your view on separation of powers?" I asked.
"A very bad idea. Haven't you heard the saying 'Unity is Strength'?
"But if there is no separation won't it lead to influence over the judiciary?" I protested.
"It won't," Thakur said. "The courts will function under my special guidance. So no one can influence them."
"What about the parliament?" I asked 'Don't you think that should be separate?"
"Parliament should also function very closely with me," Thakur replied, "without such unity it will not be possible to pass the right type of laws."
"But who will speak for the people?" I asked.
"Thakur of course. Only Thakur knows what is good for the people."
"You have already said you will not hold any presidential election after coming to power," I said "does this mean there will be no elections at all after that?"
"I didn't say that. I will hold atoll and island council elections."
"Can people vote freely for whoever they want in those elections?"
"Of course they can," Thakur replied. "In an election it's not the voters who count, it's those who count the votes who count."
"Do you mean to say you will rig the elections?" I asked.
"Not necessarily," Thakur said. "When I have all the winning cards I always play very fairly."
Finally asked my last question. "Are you prepared to face the electorate?"
"Thakur is prepared to face the people. But whether the people are prepared to face Thakur is a different question," he said. At this point I realized that I was also not prepared to face Thakur anymore. So I put off my voice recorder and left.
10 comments:
Is that a reflection of our political parties ?
he he. good article. Dr.Waheed. reallly enjoyed reading it.
Think this is rather a situation analysis than a satire.
One of your best posts. bec it conveys a powerful but a subtle idea on differences in the perception of reality.
'Thakur' has a reality of his own. Without a standard to judge his views are wrong or right, he can be considered right..
What about opposition parties? What's Thakur's stand on that? Or will he have to sit down?
Is this Meedhoo Thakuru happen to be Dr.Munavvar. Lets see the Thakuru and how he can face the people again.
i am gonna register a party by the name MVBP, (m verikamun baalaa party) with the sole aim of ousting maumoon, so called one and oly muslim lobuvethi zaeem of dhivehirajje
The problem is that pple who are on the top cannot perceive whts going around at the bottom.This dilemma will continue as long as there is a top and a bottom.
I find the comments here more interesting than the post.
I am sure that you did not intend your post at anyone, be it opposition or Government. But it is amazing to see that some people have linked your post to political figures.
I make the following observations.
1. This in an indication of some sickness in our society due to obsession with politics. You have said it is satire so why make anything out of it.
2. I wonder if Maldivians do have a sense of objective reality. We are too easily WILLING TO BE fooled by anything that psychologically appeals to us. Anything that expresses hatred to Maumoon is just as appealing as demeaning MDP (depending ofcourse which side that you are on)
3. Our reality is always OPEN to be shaped by someone. We are gullible people, not because we are not smart, but may be because we like to trust the people of authority on their word.
4. Broadening the discussion, raises questions on what we want.
Overall a very provocative post. thanks.
One very good point out of it is that some people are cheating the system and using funds given to them just for there own personal stuff. A thorough investigation must be done.
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